well i figure we have about 6 weeks of fun in sun to go. we are packing out stuff up and doing mindless patrols. the iraqis are somewhat competent and nothing happens anyway so that’s good. our biggest problem is yelling at the iraqi police at the checkpoints who just sit in their chairs and don’t stop or check anyone. we had a couple of days of rain and now everyone is freezing. we are all wearing jackets and fleece caps and it is maybe mid 60s. so cold!

right now i am trying to find the worst movie ever made. top contenders so far:
in the name of the king-burt reynolds is the king, ray liotta as evil wizard, shaggy from scooby doo is the prince and jason the transporter statham is our hero. what else do you need?
mutant chronicles- steam punk vomited onto every war movie you have ever seen but with zombies
i know who killed me- lindsay lohan and a script written in 5 minutes
the ruins- talking plants kill pointless teens who say even more pointless things
prom night- some guy apparently wanted to make a teen horror movie but lost interest 5 minutes in

if you think you have seen something worse please email me!

well we are getting closer to going home. we closed down our cop and moved everything back to the fob. the last few days on the cop we go to guard two generators and watch iraqis clean the place up. what fun! in return they got tons of free furniture, air conditioners, and other things we didn’t want to deal with but that they can sell for big bucks. we had to go through a whole bunch of hoops to show that we left it in good condition. the day after we left the iraqis trashed the place. it would have been easier to just leave and let the vultures and hyenas perform their natural acts. oh well.

we have about a month of patrols left. our sector is doing well. the iraqi army is going to take over for us. now all we do is drive out to the iraqi hq and follow them on their patrols. that is a huge step. looks like we will be back in mid dec sometime. i can’t wait.

my days of running around the streets of baghdad are done.

this is an article from the brigade magazine.

good news: word is that we should be back stateside before christmas. this is not officially on paper yet, but when the supply guys who have to ship containers back and organize logistics say something about
a move i believe them. we are tearing down our cop and moving back to the fob in a couple weeks. we will still be doing operations in this area but this move is the first step towards going home.

bad news: apparently i talk like this guy.

i always considered myself a westerner. a new mexican. yet this midwestern blood that pumps through me continuously seeps to the surface and forces its presence to be felt. i am on the radio alot and have to say “cop 821″ many times. now this is pronounced just like it is spelt. you say it just like you say the word that means police officer. apparently i like to  pronounce it as “cahp” like i am from the mean streets of grand forks.

that’s right hair mayonnaise!

sit around and watch iraqis cut back door deals. the sum of our deployment in one shot.

just like the billboard with this one

somebody sent rc cars that we promptly destroyed

restless infantrymen

this morning i felt something i haven’t felt in a long time. beautiful humidity. you can smell the water in the air. it was amazing. possible thunderstorms the next three nights. highs dipping between 105 and 108. i know it sounds dumb giving you the weather report, but this is big news. it is about time for the weather to turn for the better.

from the you couldn’t make this up if you tried file: a new email came down from the brigade we are attached to. Now when you are on the fob if you are accosted by the brigade sergeant major or his minions you must also know the safety focus of the week and the catchphrase of the week. Just so you know this week’s safety focus is seatbelts and the catchphrase is speedracer. this one man is trying to single handedly dig the army’s grave.

We have five towers around our cop. They are nothing more than stacks of hollow concrete cylinders with a flat piece for a floor that has a large hole in it. There is nothing else inside except a ladder. Well the other week our brigade sergeant major told everyone that towers now need to have platforms in them. So today we had two iraqis show up that are contractors with battalion. The said it will cost $7,000 to construct and will take 3-4 weeks. We start tearing down the cop in a month.

The brigade we are attached to had four accidental discharges the other day. An accidental discharge is whenever a round leaves your rifle and you’re not in a fight. Nine times our of ten these happen at clearing barrels, which are barrels shoved in the ground at the entrance of every base. Whenever you enter you have to place your muzzle in the barrel and clear your weapon. Now twenty years ago an accidental discharge went no higher than your squad leader. A few years ago this was a non-event. If you shot the barrel the attitude was “that’s what it is there for.” In 07 that stopped and they started calling them negligent discharges. Then the battalion commander was the authority, then the brigade commander, and now the division commander. So what that means is that if someone fails to clear the weapon properly and shoots a barrel, whose only reason for existence is to get shot, then that soldier and their entire chain of command up to brigade commander have to go talk to the division commander who is in charge of all of baghdad. I can’t even imagine another way to waste people’s time more.